I haven’t done a mental health post in a while, unless you count my “This is Fine” life update from last week. Mainly as I didn’t have anything to say, and I’m sorry if this post is jumbled or sounds off. As I’m writing this post I’m in the peek of a hypomanic phase of my Bipolar II Disorder. And rarely can I ever tell one has happened but this one was as clear as day… mud… whatever. So I thought I would just write about my experience with this phase.
I haven’t done an update post in ages and honestly I’ve written then deleted similar posts countless times now. But considering I’m posting way less than I normally do, I’m going to do a stream of consciousness where I just write everything that comes into my mind and no editing out my thoughts. And the reason I haven’t posted this is mainly I wasn’t sure how it would go over. Since a lot of it is related to mental health and work, and neither are really things I talk about on this blog. I’ve done a few posts on my mental health but absolutely nothing other than a mention on my about page when it comes to work.
Yeah, I don’t know how else to put it. And though I could’ve done this with one of my Let’s Talk About segments, this just felt right. I have a terrible relationship with money and it’s something I’ve been working on fixing. It’s something I’ve never been great at. And though I don’t want to pin part of this on my bipolar disorder, as it’s a characteristic of hypo-manic behavior and I don’t know if it’s due to that or not.
I don’t know what it is about this month or the last few weeks to be honest, but my mental state has been all over the place. Including just running out of almost all of my creative juices, hence the lack of posts lately. Having Bipolar Disorder this does happen, but I swear my phases have been getting worse every time I dip into one. And this last depressive episode has been the worst one I’ve had in years. So I thought I’d have a conversation about it and how I’m trying to pick myself up or cope with this lately episode.
I have been a massive dog lover all of my life. Hell my first words were dog and I didn’t stop repeating that word until my parents got me one. Granted it was the family dog and followed my mom around like a shadow. And I will always advocate for big dogs, they make excellent pillows to rest on or a shoulder to cry on if you need one. Now if you’ve been reading my blog for a few years, or even just a little while you’ll know I do not have a big dog. I have a rather small dog named Pixie who is going to be five this year. And ever since getting my own dog, I have such a better appreciation for them then I ever did before. Not that my first dog, Sadie, wasn’t amazing. She was my absolute best friend but she wasn’t mine at the end of the day. So these are all of the things that I’ve noticed since I got Pixie Bug and just general things about dogs.
If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know I have Bipolar Disorder Type II. And I’ve heard it all before and listen to particularly everyone say something incorrect about the disorder. Though the general population has increased awareness about the disorder formerly known as manic depression. Yet there are so many myths still floating around, some of them bother me a lot while others are just annoyances.