Another month down and one left in 2018. This month has been as packed as the rest this fall and going into the winter my schedule is about to get worse. I don’t think starting next year I will be doing these life lately posts anymore. And the number of blog posts I put out are going to be a lot less at least for the first two months while I’m doing a major project for work.
Work has been hectic this month from new clients coming on to turn over with employees including positions being filled that have been empty for year of more to switching around the entire layout of the office. Oh and planning a data center migration from physical to the cloud (Azure). Something I’ve never done before, and on features that I’ve never had experience with. So a lot to figure out to make sure it goes smoothly. To say I’ve been stressed from work is an understatement. Granted I think it’s for the best and great resume builder as my boss keeps remaining us.
Yeah, I don’t know how else to put it. And though I could’ve done this with one of my Let’s Talk About segments, this just felt right. I have a terrible relationship with money and it’s something I’ve been working on fixing. It’s something I’ve never been great at. And though I don’t want to pin part of this on my bipolar disorder, as it’s a characteristic of hypo-manic behavior and I don’t know if it’s due to that or not.
Growing up I used to always want a large group of friends or be part of the IT crowd. But that wasn’t me, I got offered to join once. After one afternoon with them, I couldn’t stand the backstabbing and left. While I did have my own group of friends and at one point joined a sorority in college, as I’ve grown up I’ve become more of a lone wolf. Not that I don’t mind other wolves being around, but I’m ok with the fact a large majority of the time I’m alone. And I don’t find that weird or lonely.
Is it really fall? Finally! I was getting so sick of summer. It’s been so hot that you couldn’t really do anything anymore. But now that’s it’s fall, I’m so excited to just enjoy the outdoors again. Also only one more month until Halloween, my favorite season ever!
So this month I had to come to terms with this Harry Potter closet that I’ve been feeling like I was suffocating in. It was easier to deal with when I thought I was leaving in well August. But August has come and gone, and I’m not moving out any time soon. Enough things have happened financially mainly due to my car that I just can’t move out without going into serious debt at the moment. But staying at my mom’s house in this tiny room, at least helps me “get back onto my feet.” However, this room is driving me insane. I also think half of it is I feel like I don’t belong anywhere. I live in a closet. And my sister or mom come in all of the time to bug me… or really to see Pixie who is under my bed 9 out of 10 times. So I just don’t have my own space anymore. And it was fine in the beginning, but now I’m just losing it. Over everything. I just don’t know how much more I can stand it but at the same time, I don’t want to destroy myself where I’m starving myself because food for myself is not has high priority as gas or food for Pixie. I’m just a pickle in the middle and I hate it. So I somehow need to figure out how to adjust this Harry Potter closet into being something easier to handle where I’m not feeling like I’m just going to lose it at any moment.